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The sleeping drama continues. Each night Jack comes up with more creative and ridiculous reasons to delay his bedtime. So we keep putting him to bed earlier ... 8:30, 8:15, 7:30 ... then even 7:15 p.m.

We don't know what else to do.

We've added nightlights, orange-colored string lights (one set with jack-o-lanterns). We've threatened Santa, school, TV, Nintendo ... nothing works. He may be the most stubborn, ridiculous person I have ever met. He doesn't want to go to bed and he doesn't care about anything else.

We've cut his nap. We've cut any and all shows that could maybe stimulate bad dreams ... because he does have bad dreams, just as I do. We have added a mini CD player with only kids songs and holiday tunes ... think happy thoughts.

All you parents-to-be ... under no circumstance should you bend on bedtime when the baby is young. You think now that you won't -- just like I thought Jack wouldn't have sugar until he was in kindergarten. But when it's 3 a.m. and the baby up yet again and you and your spouse are so, so tired, a cozy bed for three seems more than inviting. But really, it's not good for anyone.

Dear Jack ...

As you grow, let's talk more about all the questions your teeny 4-year-old mind struggles to wrap around. Maybe then you'll realize there just aren't answers to all your questions about God and heaven and our relatives who have passed. For now, just rest and enjoy your childhood. Have fun with your brother. Play with your trains and read books and draw pictures of Spider-Man.

Let's shelf this for now and when you are older we can talk about how you're not invincible and let's try to take each day as a gift. Try not to worry now, buddy.

Unfortunately you've inherited guilt and worry from both your parents. The Irish curse perhaps ... one of many. But as 'Stina said to me last night: Worrying is like a rocking chair. It's not going to get you anywhere.

So sleep. Please sleep. For God's sake sleep worry-free. I wish I help you find peace -- you are only 4.

And always remember I love you. Even when I am leaning over your bed begging you to close your eyes.

Mama

P.S. When you are older and you beg to just sleep; when you waste your days away catching up on your teen metabolism I am going to remind you of these days where you deprived your father and me rest. And I will describe to you in great detail how we fretted about your bad dreams, sleep walking and your lay-it-on thick guilt trips. No need to worry about that either.